If Jeopardy can get away with a random Hodge Podge category then so can I:
1. Doesn’t anybody else notice that Safety Harbor is redundant? Or Mount Summit? Or Djibouti, Djibouti?? Stop naming things twice.
2. I hate when personal interactions affect my understanding of and reaction to words. Like retard. Or creative. Or robust. Why can’t people leave well enough alone? And Ben Roethlisberger alone
3. If Italy looks like a boot then Panama must be discarded pantyhose.
4. Future season of The Bachelor: “Will you accept this Charlie Rose?”… AND THEY WILL!
5. As great as soap is to clean shit up, it can be a royal pain to clean up itself. Stubborn soap scum in the shower. Excess dish detergent around the sink of which there is no solution or dissolution. Hand soap that seems to creep it’s way onto the outside of the SoftSoap bottle (perhaps why they make those things disposable).
6. The best damn motivational message I ever saw, on a billboard not more than a few miles from where the lecture was delivered:
7. Cynics, like comics, can be geniuses. And perhaps one in the same. “Would you be offended if I told you to stick to your strengths?” - A fellow since passed who I wished would have found and stuck with his.
8. Fact: There are companies that exist solely to name products. They’re called catchword naming specialists. Check one out called Catchword Branding and commence wondering what the fuck is wrong with this world (as well as what did you do with your life to not make earning a living so easy).
9. Does the word “cool” carry any value anymore? Or is it just a catchall for when we have no better way to aptly describe something or rather just don’t care to?
10. Loyalty is an amazing force. Bake some cookies and everyone will want one. Decorate with a rival NFL team’s logo and most will not only pass on the treats but will also hate you.
11. “Al dente” is short for impatient.
12. “It is not the critic who counts, not the one who points out how the strong man stumbled, or how the doer of deeds might have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred with sweat and dust, and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, and spends himself in a worthy cause; who, if he wins, knows the triumph of high achievement; and who, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.” - Teddy Roosevelt
13. Editor’s note: “I’m afraid the type of man being praised by Teddy has no place in modern society. Today the kudos are reserved for the critics.” – Don Dodge